How to Win: Capturing a Resilient Perspective

Welcome to a journey of self-discovery and personal growth where a resilient perspective becomes your compass. In this article, we delve into the transformative power of focusing on yourself, your people, and your place, unraveling the secrets to enhanced mental health, personal strength, and meaningful relationships. Let’s embark on a path that goes beyond challenges, crafting a life that thrives on resilience.


I am happy to say last year was a good year for me and I hope the same for you. It was not a perfect year because life just doesn’t work that way. I did accomplish my one goal. My one BIG goal. It was not easy. In fact, it was much more difficult than I imagined. Isn’t that true with most worthy goals?

Capturing a Resilient Perspective: Three Focus Circles

Like you, I am not a perfected human being but I have learned to practice a resilient perspective. A resilient perspective embraces the ideas of thoughtfulness, self-awareness, self-leadership, gratefulness, and focus. What I’m about to share works for me and it has proven helpful to many of my clients.

Imagine a dart board, a target. There are three overlapping rings or circles. The one in the middle, we often call the bull’s eye. Imagine that circle at the center of your target but make it bigger than the typical dart board. Make it about one-third the size of the overall target. Let’s call that center circle YOUR PERSON. We will come back to this in a minute.

Draw the next circle around your center circle. Let’s call this circle YOUR PEOPLE. We will come back too…

Now, let’s draw one more circle around the second, and let’s call this one YOUR PLACE.

YOUR PERSON

If you want a better life, you’ve got to work on yourself. You are the most difficult person to lead and the work never ends. When you work on your life, you become better in every way. I have found the following questions most helpful in this pursuit:

  • What is my life’s vision?

Mine is to help good people win. It’s to inspire faith, to shape character, and to shape leadership. How did I come to this conclusion? By paying attention to how God made me and the opportunities he has in front of me. By noticing what makes me cry (both sad and happy tears). By seeing results.

  • If I win at nothing else over the next (month, quarter, year), what one thing will I accomplish?

Like the previous question, this one requires much thought. The power in the answer brings great focus and commitment. But there is more. When you identify one major achievement and you go after it with all your faculties, you will notice many other good things get done along the way. The problem with most goal setting is that we really don’t know how to answer this question so we end up coming up with too many goals creating confusion and watering down the potency of our power OR we stop setting goals because we don’t like what losing feels like.

  • What kind of person must I become to accomplish this goal and life vision?

Perhaps the greatest outcome for achieving worthwhile goals is what it requires of you. How it changes you. How you grow and learn. How the process matures and makes you better. Simply put, if you want a better marriage, work on yourself. You’ll be surprised what that does. If you want better results at work, make growing as a person your priority. It’s contagious. When you become a better person and leader, everyone benefits.

YOUR PEOPLE

We all have dozens and maybe hundreds of people in our lives. It’s overwhelming sometimes. The demands and expectations exceed our human capacity. We make this reality worse because we do not think about this category of our lives in a strategic and purposeful manner. I encourage you to consider the following points and incorporate them into your life’s vision.

  • Choose your people.

It sounds discriminating, doesn’t it? That’s the point. You must realize your limited capacity for meaningful relationships. You can only be in one place at a time. You can only do so much and be effective at it. You simply cannot please everyone… as if that should be the goal anyway. Consider this approach:

  • Choose people who will help you.

You read that right. You cannot help anyone if no one is speaking into your life. If no one is helping you carry your load and sharing your mission. Choose mentors. Hire people who have both the capacity and desire to help you. Stop hiring people to help them. If you hire the right people, all will benefit. Have a high bar for those in your inner circle.

  • Choose your family.

If you can lovingly and wisely navigate your emotions, affections, and influence within your family, you can do it anywhere. To love or not to love your family is simply not a choice. It’s not about what is easy. It’s about what is right and good. It’s about providing a place where families can take shelter from a world that is not always kind or forgiving. It is about creating safety in a sometimes dangerous place.

  • Choose someone you can help.

I follow the FAT rule. I cannot help people who are looking for a handout. It’s not how God made things. I might be able to help those who are FAT. They have demonstrated FAITHFULNESS. Maybe they have not had the opportunities I had. Maybe they don’t know the people I know. BUT they have been faithful with what they do have. They are also AVAILABLE. In other words, they are hungry. They are not comfortable. They are grateful but dissatisfied with their circumstances. They are TEACHABLE. I cannot help the victim. The one who believes the world is against them. They are closed off to effort. They are closed to ideas. They lack faith. The truth is… I have always been ambitious even without resources. That’s who I am looking to choose.

YOUR PLACE

Your place is your context. It can represent a season of your life, your physical reality, your job, the condition of your relationships, or even an addiction to manage and overcome. Your place is where you and your people find yourselves. If you work on yourself and you become more strategic and purposeful in your relationships, you will have the power to win in your place. Here are some thoughts to consider:

  • Embrace your place

If it’s a bad place, embrace it. Don’t be a whiner, quitter, or victim. Consider all the factors of your context. The good, bad, and ugly. As you ponder ALL these things, you should be able to envision what can be. As you see what can happen, you will develop the steps to get there. This is leadership. Don’t run away from it. Nothing is to be gained by removing yourself from the uncomfortable to the comfortable. That ambition is foolish and immature. It will yield more loss and delays. If it’s a good place, make it better. Don’t let it make you lazy and careless.

  • Your place is temporary

On one hand, embrace your place as if you are going to drain every ounce of good out of it for as long as it takes. On the other hand, do not attach your identity to your place. Nothing on this side of eternity lasts forever. There are controllables and uncontrollables. Do your best with the controllables and release yourself from the things completely out of your control. Enjoy every success. Learn from failures. Move on to the next season and embrace it!

FINAL THOUGHTS

Much of resilience comes from having a reasonable and workable perspective. Breaking life down into these three circles of concentration will improve your mental health, personal strength, relationships, and effectiveness no matter what challenges you face.

Explore More Content

Ready to capture a more resilient perspective and elevate your journey of growth in 2024? Explore more empowering content on our website – from insightful blogs to engaging podcasts. Uncover strategies, gain inspiration, and embrace the tools for a better you. Click the suggestions below to start your transformative adventure now!

Together, we can invest in great leaders. You can make a difference! 💙

Thank you for reading our Monday Moments! If this was helpful, share this with a friend!

Ready to become a better communicator and build your character?
Join the Lead Today Community to get more info.

We deliver free leadership training through ​​The Today Counts Show podcast.
🎧 Listen/Watch on your favorite platform:  Spotify | Apple | Youtube | Lead Today Website

Get a copy of Jim’s new book Story: The Art Of Learning From Your Past

​Here are FREE gifts for you!

​Have you seen our YouTube Channel? We are releasing more content to help you grow.  Come check out our latest videos, and while you’re there, please like the video and subscribe.

​👍 Follow us on Social Media for more content

​Need a Keynote Speaker for your next team meeting, community gathering, or training session? I’d love to speak to your group (in person or virtual)! Contact me to discuss your specific needs and desired outcomes. BOOK JIM NOW

🎙️ Interested in becoming our next podcast guest? Send us an email: jim@leadtodaycommunity.com

👕 Spread encouragement and support with our Lead Today Hebrews 3:13 shirt. Order yours now

​You may further support our mission through donation and by purchase of our books and merchandise.

The Lead Today Community exists to raise up moral and effective leaders in every sector of society.

0

Make every day count by planning with purpose—get your FREE Today Counts planner!

DOWNLOAD PRINTABLE PLANNER